Recalibrating Practices: How Will You G-R-O-W? Obedience=Love

“If I obey Jesus Christ in the seemingly random circumstances of life, they become pinholes through which I see the face of God.” Oswald Chambers

Every year I pick a word to recalibrate me. But, as a woman flooded with words, it’s swollen in the past years to an acronym:

G-R-O-W.

Gratitude. Resilience. Obedience. Wonder.

(In 2021, I’m making it G-R-O-W-L because we all need some laughter. Every day.)

These words guide my “rule of life,” a spiritual practice that helps set a sacred pace and path for life’s journey. (More on developing a “rule of life” in an upcoming newsletter.)

In this post, I’ve finally gotten to “O” for obedience.

I do not want to focus on obedience (even though it made a terrific anagram). I want to sidestep that word—perhaps not blatantly rebel—but rationalize that there’s got to be a better way to love and please God than simply listen and obey him. It was because of my resistance I knew I needed to wrestle with this word.

The biblical definition of obedience is “to hear God’s word and act accordingly.” (Holman’s Illustrated Bible Dictionary) At its root, to obey means to hear, trust, submit/surrender. It is the activating ingredient of love and worship.

Me? I want to play “religion” by my own rules or make excuses that those rules don’t apply to me. I can think of dramatic ways to impress God, but he has answered that with “to obey is better than sacrifice.” I Sam 15:22 ESV

I long to love Jesus more but avoid annoying truths and difficult commands. Jesus makes it clear that “if you love me, you will keep my commandments.” John 14:15 ESV

Pre-obedience is the worse. The more I procrastinate or distract myself, the more I live a foggy and fearful life. Post-obedience is best described in James 1. “Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are a listener when you are anything but, letting the Word go in one ear and out the other. Act on what you hear! Those who hear and don’t act are like those who glance in the mirror, walk away, and two minutes later have no idea who they are, what they look like. But whoever catches a glimpse of the revealed counsel of God—the free life!—even out of the corner of his eye, and sticks with it, is no distracted scatterbrain but a man or woman of action. That person will find delight and affirmation in the action.” James 1:22-25 MSG

All of the gospel is so counterintuitive. The obedient life is the free life, a delighting life.

My Utmost for His Highest has been my go-to devotional for decades. One of Oswald Chambers’ favorite topics is obedience.

“If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself. Jesus Christ will not force me to obey Him, but I must. And as soon as I obey Him, I fulfill my spiritual destiny. My personal life may be crowded with small, petty happenings, altogether insignificant. But if I obey Jesus Christ in the seemingly random circumstances of life, they become pinholes through which I see the face of God. Then, when I stand face to face with God, I will discover that through my obedience thousands were blessed. . . If I obey Jesus Christ, the redemption of God will flow through me to the lives of others, because behind the deed of obedience is the reality of Almighty God.” My Utmost for His Highest, November 2

For me, I am recalibrating myself to pause, listen, and ask what obedience would be in a situation. And then try not to overthink it, but just do it. I keep coming back to this hymn:

Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

It sounds so quaint and simplistic. But as someone who’s tried “other ways,” I hum this hymn a lot more now. (Although I’d love for someone insert the word “wait” after trust and obey.)

Next entry will be on Wonder! (An easier word to live out than obedience for me!)

Recalibrating Practices: How Will You G-R-O-W? Practice Resilience

Every year I pick a word to recalibrate me. But, as a woman flooded with words, it’s swollen in the past years to an acronym:

G-R-O-W.

Gratitude. Resilience. Obedience. Wonder.

(In 2021, I’m making it G-R-O-W-L because we all need some laughter. Every day.)

These words guide my “rule of life,” a spiritual practice that helps set a sacred pace and path for life’s journey. (More on developing a “rule of life” in an upcoming newsletter.)

In my last post, I focused on gratitude. 

Now it’s time for resilience. If I want to keep following this wandering and winding path of writing, leading a non-profit arts organization, and “soul tending,” I need to be resilient.

What is resilience?

“Psychologists define resilience as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress—such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stressors. As much as resilience involves ‘bouncing back’ from these difficult experiences, it can also involve profound personal growth.” (American Psychological Association)

Resilience is the willow tree of attributes. It flexes, stretches, and bends. The winds blow, failure hits, rejection hurts , loss and grief and disappointment happen. I can break, give up, or sway in the breeze and sink my roots deeper into God.

Resilience is in my genes. My dad survived three different kinds of cancers, hepatitis C, and heart disease for three decades before dying at 88. He wanted to be with his grandkids that much. After my dad passed away, my mom resisted leaving her beloved Amelia Island. When it became clear she needed to move close to me, she grumbled but flexed. A few weeks after settling into Birmingham, she suffered a massive stroke. She recovered most of what she lost by being the model patient for her physical, speech, and occupational therapists.

Then COVID-19 hit.

She went into lockdown and her recovery slowed. She lost the sight of her left eye through the stroke and the sight in her right eye became blurrier which made reading more difficult. We went to nearly every eye subspecialist in Birmingham and she put our saint of an optometrist on speed dial. She was convinced if she only got thicker lenses for her eyeglasses, she could read again. When it finally sunk in that it was macular degeneration and not a faulty prescription, she nearly gave up.

But she didn’t.

Once she accepted that her eyesight wouldn’t improve, she began listening to the rehabilitation specialists who gave her tools to adapt and keep on reading. It’s not what she wants. But she has grit and is trying to learn new technology. Accept. Adapt. Endure. Hope.

I wish I could “inherit” resilience without experiencing the suffering and enduring and changing that goes with it. But it doesn’t work that way.

So, how do we build resilience into our souls?

Recalibrate

No path to our eternal home is linear. That road is filled with roadblocks, detours, and delays. We can train ourselves to keep turning our eyes back to Jesus who is the way (our direction), the truth (our destination), the life (our desire). We remember where we’re going and why it’s worth it. We acknowledge the reality that this path we’re on is a broken road and filled with suffering.

 So, no wonder we don’t give up. For even though our outer person gradually wears out, our inner being is renewed every single day. We view our slight, short-lived troubles in the light of eternity. We see our difficulties as the substance that produces for us an eternal, weighty glory far beyond all comparison. 2 Corinthians 4:16-17 TPT

Build Endurance

Scripture is essential to resilience. The Bible speaks of enduring with hope and reminds us of God’s faithfulness to those who’ve passed before us. More than anything, it shows us the resilient joy of Jesus and what he endured on our behalf.

For all those words which were written long ago are meant to teach us today; that when we read in the scriptures of the endurance of men and of all the help that God gave them in those days, we may be encouraged to go on hoping in our own time. Romans 15:14 Phillips

Do you see what this means—all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we’d better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls! Hebrews 12:1-3 The Message

Find Community

Make it a priority to plant yourself in life-giving, mutual relationships. A community of people where you can laugh and weep together. Where you will ask for help. Seek a church which focuses on grace and vulnerability and accepts that everyone is on a broken road together.

Think of the Alternative

What if you stay stuck, go numb, or give up? You may need to adjust your goals. Maybe you’re past parachuting, winning the Olympics, or running for governor. But you’re not past the desire to try new adventures or impact your world. Think of resilience as buoyancy in the storm with Jesus as your anchor.

Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting—for he will never disappoint you! Psalm 27:14 TPT

Remember Who Will Never Let You Go

Here’s the best news of all. God will never ever let you go. So, hang on, knowing his grip on you is sure and forever. He is the God who holds you. That’ll give you the courage to keep taking those wobbly baby steps of resilience on your way home.

I give to them the gift of eternal life and they will never be lost and no one has the power to snatch them out of my hands. My Father, who has given them to me as his gift, is the mightiest of all, and no one has the power to snatch them from my Father’s care. John 10:28-29 TPT

One definition of resilience is about the power of an object (or person) to return to its original form or purpose after being bent, compressed, crushed, or stretched. Jesus was crushed for us and we are assured that God will restore us to our intended shape and purpose in Him.  

God knew what he was doing from the very beginning. He decided from the outset to shape the lives of those who love him along the same lines as the life of his Son. The Son stands first in the line of humanity he restored. We see the original and intended shape of our lives there in him. After God made that decision of what his children should be like, he followed it up by calling people by name. After he called them by name, he set them on a solid basis with himself. And then, after getting them established, he stayed with them to the end, gloriously completing what he had begun. Romans 8:29-30 The Message

 Link here to read practical ways to build resilience into your life. Link here to listen to the resilient truth that God will never let us go.

Ephesian Bible Study Now Available Print and Ebook

Wow! The First Bible Study is Here! And More to Come!

The first of my 10 Bible studies hot off the press is Ephesians: God’s Great Mystery Revealed: In Christ, In His Church. It’s part of my Beholding-is-Becoming series which connects people to the love of Christ through intimate, intelligent, and accessible Scripture studies using an integrated head/heart/hands rhythm with:

• 10-minute daily devotional questions (and an “express” version for those overwhelmed by life)

• Discovery sheets for deeper, personal connection with Scripture

• Concise commentary

• Guides for teachers and facilitators (email me at nancy@nancywcarroll.com for a PDF!)

You can purchase it on Amazon (or contact me at nancy@nancywcarroll.com if you want a bulk amount).

Would you add your review?

You can review Ephesians on Amazon (link here for tips on how to) and Goodreads (link here). Reviews are helpful and appreciated. If you did my Ephesians study a few years back, I’d love for you to give a review. Thanks so much.

Here’s some information about the book:

 It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Ephesians1:11 The Message

Ephesians is my heart book, where I grappled with the “believe it or not” truth of God’s love for me. This is the book where I caught the picture that it is through all of our individual puzzle pieces fitting together that we show Jesus Christ, God’s great Masterpiece, to the world. I pray that God can open the eyes of your heart to believe his love for you and his destiny for you as his beloved and royal children.

For a sneak peek, these are the chapters for the study, with the hope of soaking deeply in this amazing epistle!

Discover Your Destiny: Sons and Daughters of the King

Overview of Ephesians          Discover Your Destiny: In Christ  

Ephesians 1:1-14                     And Can It Be? (Yes!)

Ephesians 1:15-23                   Living the Unbelievably True Life

Become Who You Really Are: His “Master Pieces”

Ephesians 2:1-10                     Piece of Work or Masterpiece?

Ephesians 2:11-3:13                 God’s Great Mystery Revealed

Ephesians 3:14-21                   Living the So Much More Life

Walk Out Who You Are Together: His Beloved Children

Ephesians 4:1-16                     Time to Grow Up

Ephesians 4:17-5:21                 The Cinderella Syndrome

Ephesians 5:21-6:9                  Living the Royal Life Relationally

Stand Strong Together: Royal Warriors

Ephesians 6:10-24                   A Call to Arms and Prayer

Ephesians Summary               Living Out Loud

For those teaching it and facilitating small groups, please email me for the leader’s guide for additional notes and resources.

Thanks to God and to my agent Julie Gwinn at Seymour Agency and to Brian Kannard with Donelson Press! And to all of you who kept asking me for these studies. AGOG! All by the Grace of God. All to the Glory of God.

Recalibrating Practices: How will you G-R-O-W this year?

Every year I choose a word as a theme to recalibrate around. But, as a woman flooded with words, it’s swollen in the past few years into an acronym : G-R-O-W.

Gratitude. Resilience. Obedience. Wonder.

(In 2021, I’m going to make it G-R-O-W-L because we all need some laughter. Every day.)

These words are part of my current “rule of life,” a spiritual practice which serves as as a way to set a sacred pace for your life. (More on developing a “rule of life” in an upcoming newsletter.)

G-R-O-W jelled when three friends from different seasons of my life who didn’t know each other gathered to help usher in my 60th birthday at the beach. One afternoon, we sat for a few hours with our feet in the sand and spoke about our biggest fears and desires as we stare down the second half (or last quarter in my case).

It was then I realized the things I fear are the flip side of what I most want.  

I fear ending up bitter, cynical, and judgmental. I fear II’ll give up on my dreams, deaden my longings, and become rigid and inflexible in my beliefs and habits. I fear I’ll lose my love for Jesus and rationalize or minimize my sin. I fear I’ll become bored, apathetic, tired, and joyless.

What do I most desire as I stare down my failures, confusion, disappointments? I want to be grateful every day, to keep going and trying new things. (Which means I want to keep failing.) I want to love Jesus more and respond to him out of love not as a means to an end. I want to live a life of wide-eyed joy in the mysteries and beauty of life. And I want to laugh uncontrollably—tears streaming and unable to catch my breath—with those around me.

For the next few posts, I will explore G-R-O-W-L. Starting with:

GRATITUDE 

Henri Nouwen writes, “Gratitude is the awareness that life in all its manifestations is a gift for which we want to give thanks. The closer we come to God in prayer, the more we become aware of the abundance of God’s gifts to us. We may even discover the presence of these gifts in the midst of our pains and sorrows. The mystery of the spiritual life is that many of the events, people, and situations that for a long time seemed to inhibit our way to God become ways of being united more deeply with him. What seemed a hindrance proves to be a gift. Thus, gratitude becomes a quality of our hearts that allows us to live joyfully and peacefully even though our struggles continue.”

There are wonderful podcasts, Ted Talks, and apps which can help retrain your brain to gratitude. I love the Five Minute Journal because I can do it in two minutes a day and add a photo. It’s good to have a place to skim back and remember that life isn’t so bad.

Ron Rolheiser, OMI writes, “Gratitude is the ultimate virtue, undergirding everything else, even love. It is synonymous with holiness. Gratitude not only defines sanctity, it also defines maturity. We are mature to the degree that we are grateful. But what brings us there? What makes for a deeper human maturity?” He then lists 10 ways we need to address to embrace gratitude. I’d love to know which most resonates with you.

He writes, “God is a prodigiously-loving, fully-understanding, completely-empathic parent. We are mature and free of false anxiety to the degree that we grasp that and trust that truth.”

 Start with just soaking in some of h the many Scriptures on thankfulness, like Colossians 3:12-17. Before going to bed, write down 1-3 small or big things you’re grateful for that day. Or take a photo a day of one thing you’re grateful for. Or thank someone (with specific reasons why you’re thankful) once a day (at least!)

Please let me know your gratitude habits.

Next up: Resilience!